Stevie Wonder & ELO, Next CD Update |
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J. Jackson, lead singer and lyricist for ApologetiX here.
Hey, dig this: I just realized the other day that our latest trip through the Bible will end on December 31! It usually takes us about 355 days to go from Genesis 1 through Revelation 22. Consequently, every year we start about a week and a half earlier than the time before.
That means we’ll start our next trip on January 1, so if you’re an ApologetiX fan who wants to make a New Year’s resolution to read through the entire Bible, there’s never been a better time than 2025, because we’ll be right beside you.
Do you have your Christmas shopping done yet? I think I’m just about there, and most of the stuff is wrapped, too. We still have to put up and decorate our tree, but we hope to do that today. Our curious kitten, Ozzy, has already been investigating the boxes, which are right next to the desk where I’m typing this.
I know a lot of you were hoping that our upcoming 76th CD, X-Tract, would be out in time for Christmas. I was, too, but turnaround times have gotten longer with our manufacturer this year. They, in turn, are at the mercy of the suppliers they use.
We sent out the master recording (which they needed first) on November 14 and the artwork on November 26. Unfortunately, our contact there tells me the current ETA is December 23. That means we’ll have the CDs time for Christmas, but our fans won’t have them till the following week, because of postal holidays and slowdowns.
It’s not the first time we’ve had a CD come out in December but not in time for Christmas. The same thing happened with Unconditional Releases in 2014, Overdue Books in 2020, and Apolog80s: Back From the Future in 2021.
We plan to start taking orders for X-Tract as early as tomorrow. As always, we’ll get them out as soon as quickly as we can. In other news, we plan to release our final single of 2024 next weekend, Lord willing, and that will include the last two songs needed for our 77th CD.
And we’ve already begun writing lyrics and recording instrumental parts for some of the parodies our 78th! But let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves ... |
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New Single: Top 10s from ’76 & ‘77 |
On Sunday, we released our 24th single of 2024. It spoofs a pair of Top 10 songs from 1977 that originally appeared on Top 10 albums from 1976. |
Seduced - Sir Duke - Stevie Wonder Twelve Reformed Lives - Telephone Line - Electric Light Orchestra |
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The Stories Behind the Songs on This Single |
J. Jackson, lead singer and lyricist for ApologetiX here again.
Here are the stories behind the songs on our 24th single of 2024. SEDUCED
I wrote most of this parody in November 2024 but got the chorus in August 2023. For years before that, I'd heard people theorize that God had given up on America and/or the world and/or the Church, because of our sinfulness.
I do believe the events in Revelation will occur someday, but I don't know if that's in the near or distant future. Either way, I don't think a fatalistic attitude helps us. Rather, we should be "making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil" (Ephesians 5:16).
I'm reminded of Abraham pleading on behalf of Sodom (probably for Lot's sake) and how the LORD said "For the sake of ten, I will not destroy it" (Genesis 18:32). It turned out there weren't even 10, but God still sent angels to rescue Lot and his family.
How about when Elijah thought he was the only one left in the land who still followed the LORD? God told him, "Yet I reserve seven thousand in Israel — all whose knees have not bowed down to Baal and whose mouths have not kissed him” (1 Kings 19:18). Remember: At the time, Israel was ruled by the wicked tandem of King Ahab and Queen Jezebel.
Finally, there's Acts 18:9-10, when the Lord says this to Paul in a vision: "Do not be afraid; keep on speaking, do not be silent. For I am with you, and no one is going to attack and harm you, because I have many people in this city." That city was Corinth, infamous for its extreme immorality.
As noted theologian L.P. "Yogi" Berra once said, "It ain't over till it's over."
TWELVE REFORMED LIVES
"Telephone Line" was the song that introduced me to ELO. I almost bought the single when it was a hit, and I did buy its parent album, A New World Record, a year later.
However, the main reason I wanted to spoof that tune was because of ApX keyboardist Rich Mannion and mixer David Michael, who are both big fans of ELO and "Telephone Line.” In January 2020, Rich told me it was his "all-time favorite ELO song.”
I got the parody idea on November 24, 2024, and considered “Twelve Unknown Lives,” "Twelve of Our Lives," “Twelve Little Lives,” etc., but “Twelve RE-formed Lives” sounded the most like “tel-E-phone Line” when sung.
The lyrics find the Apostle John as the last of the Twelve left alive, talking about writing the Gospel. It dawned on me later that our previous ELO parody, "Can't Let the Crowd in My Head," was sung from the perspective of Peter as he neared the end.
David Michael's dad, Ronnie, passed away at age 66 on September 5, 2024, after a battle with cancer. When David was a kid, Ronnie used to play ELO a lot and would even sing "Telephone Line" to him.
After I sent David my words, he reminded me that he had read through the Gospel of John with his dad in the final months of his life: "Aw man," he texted, "that adds even more specialty to it because of my memories of reading those last couple chapters of John with my dad.”
In fact, the ringing phone at the beginning of "Twelve Unknown Lives" is an actual recording of David calling Ronnie's old phone. |
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New USBs in Stock, Include Upcoming CD |
Our new ApologetiX USB thumb drives are now in stock ... and they even include our upcoming 76th CD, X-Tract, which won’t be released till later this month.
The USBs contain the digital versions of all of our CDs, plus any singles, EPs, or rarities that aren’t on CD yet.
Emblazoned with the band's logo, they have a storage capacity of 16 GB, and they’re write-enabled, so you can add more music to them if and when you get future ApX downloads.
They’re available for a donation of $150 or more. If you've donated for our complete library before, they're available for a donation of $50 or more. |
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Get Our Complete Library for $100 |
We recently revamped the downloadable version of our complete library. Now it comes in a PDF with pictures of every album and single for easy reference. You just click on the ones you need to download them instantly.
We're giving our complete library on download to everyone who donates $100 this week.
That's 1724 tracks, including various versions (studio, live, rarity, album, single, EP, revised, remastered, etc.), plus side projects ... even our most-recent single and our latest CD. |
Standard CDs 1993–2024 (943 tracks) Remastered Classics CDs (219 tracks) Singles, EPs, Rarities, Side Projects (562 tracks)
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Bible-Reading for the Next Two Weeks |
We began our latest trip through the Bible on Wednesday, April 3.
Here's our Bible-reading plan for the next two weeks for those of you reading along with us:
Sat., Dec. 14 - Hosea 13-14 Sun., Dec. 15 - Joel 1-3 Mon., Dec. 16 - Amos 1-3 Tue., Dec. 17 - Amos 4-6 Wed., Dec. 18 - Amos 7-9, Obadiah 1 Thu., Dec. 19 - Jonah 1-4 Fri., Dec. 20 - Micah 1-3 Sat., Dec. 21 - Micah 4-7 Sun., Dec. 22 - Nahum 1-3 Mon., Dec. 23 - Habakkuk 1-3 Tue.. Dec. 24- Zephaniah 1-3 Wed., Dec. 25 - Haggai 1-2 Thu., Dec. 26 - Zechariah 1-3 Fri., Dec. 27 - Zechariah 4-6
Note: If you don't have a Bible handy, you can look up these passages for free on Bible Gateway. They have about 60 different English translations/versions there to choose from, plus translations in many other languages, many of which also have multiple translations/versions. |
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ApologetiX Christmas Playlist |
ApologetiX Christmas Playlist
Now that the holiday season is upon us, ApologetiX has 36 parodies you can use for your Christmas playlist.
You can arrange your playlist in any order you like. Here's what they are and where you can find them, from the newest to the oldest:
1. Magi - Magic - The Cars 2. Little Jesus (Simeon's Song) - Little Jeannie - Elton John
3. Elizabeth's Song - In Your Room - The Bangles 4. Eve of Instruction - Eve of Destruction - Barry McGuire Note: These two songs were later included on our Eclectic CD in 2023.
5. Humble Heart - Hungry Heart - Bruce Springsteen
6. The Wonder of Christmas - I Wish - Stevie Wonder 7. Once We're Over the Line - One Toke Over the Line - Brewer & Shipley Note: These two songs were later included on our Double Take CD in 2019.
8. Marry Mary - Mary Mary - The Monkees Note: This song was later included on our Double Take CD in 2019.
9. Grandma Got Won Over by a Stranger - Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer - Elmo & Patsy 10. God's Child in the City - Hot Child in the City - Nick Gilder Note: These two songs were later included on our Very Vicarious CD in 2017.
11. Grinch Girl (Rich Girl by Hall & Oates) 12. Hanukkah (Hot Stuff by Donna Summer)
13. Messiah - Desire - U2 14. Virgin - Urgent - Foreigner 15. Cut-Rate Hotel - Heartbreak Hotel - Elvis Presley 16. Child King - Wild Thing - Tone Lōc 17. Mary's Got a Son - Janie's Got a Gun - Aerosmith 18. One Night in Bethlehem - One Night in Bangkok - Murray Head 19. Christ in the Stable - Cat's in the Cradle - Harry Chapin 20. Excuse Me, Pal, It's Christmastime - Purple Haze - Jimi Hendrix 21. Nice Iced Pavement - Ice Ice Baby - Vanilla Ice 22. Wise Men Still - Can't Help Falling in Love With You - Elvis Presley 23. We Didn't Start Messiah - We Didn't Start the Fire - Billy Joel
24. Micah No. 5 - Mambo No. 5 - Lou Bega 25. December 5 or 6 B.C. - December 1963 - The Four Seasons 26. Hotel Can't Afford Ya - Hotel California - The Eagles 27. Manger - Angel - Shaggy with Rayvon 28. Bethlehem's Boy - My Best Friend's Girl - The Cars 29. Tip From an Angel - Lips of an Angel - Hinder 30. Christmasnite - Kryptonite - Three Doors Down 31. Try Micah - Drive My Car - The Beatles 32. Don't Stop Till Egypt - Don't Stop Believin' - Journey 33. JC's Mom - Stacy's Mom - Fountains of Wayne 34. Lived the Day You Died - Love the Way You Lie - Eminem 35. Flurry - Blurry - Puddle of Mudd 36. Santa Claus - Panama - Van Halen (Note: This is the new 2013 version) |
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Influential Albums #1675–1681 |
J. Jackson, lead singer and lyricist for ApologetiX here again.
Here are the latest entries in the "albums that influenced me" series I started writing in May 2020.
Note: Just because an album appears on this list doesn't mean I give it a blanket endorsement. Many of the secular albums on this list are mainly there because they wound up being spoofed by ApologetiX.
1675. Prehysterical - ApologetiX The 57th ApologetiX LP came out in early December 2019 and featured parodies of David Bowie, The Cars, Grand Funk, Jimi Hendrix, The Greg Kihn Band, Kiss, Led Zeppelin, John Cougar Mellencamp, Men at Work, Mountain, and Steve Winwood. Back in 2008, noted agnostic Bill Maher had written and starred in a documentary called Religulous, apparently implying that religion was ridiculous. With that in mind, we called this album Prehysterical, because we think some popular theories about prehistoric times are pretty hysterical, as we expounded upon in tracks #7 and 8, "You're All Like Troglodytes" and "Trilobite Love." We believe in dinosaurs and other creatures that no longer inhabit the earth, whenever there is ample fossil evidence. However, we believe that’s evidence for extinction (which is still observable in nature today), not evolution (which isn’t). We also don’t believe those fossils are as old as some scientists say. That makes us look like idiots in the eyes of many, but we live in prehysterical times — the times before the real laughter begins. Sure, the world may enjoy some laughs at our expense now, but keep this in mind: “Like the crackling of thorns under the pot, so is the laughter of fools” (Ecclesiastes 7:6a). In today’s day and age, when laughter doesn’t mean derision, it’s often merely a diversion: “Even in laughter the heart may ache, and rejoicing may end in grief” (Proverbs 14:13). But those who trust in the Lord and His Word have this promise: “He will wipe every tear from their eyes” (Revelation 21:4a). As it says in Psalm 126:2, when the LORD brought His people out of captivity to return to the Promised Land: “Our mouths were filled with laughter, our tongues with songs of joy.” 1676. Born on a Pirate Ship - Barenaked Ladies Released on March 19, 1996, Barenaked Ladies' third LP only went to #12 on the Canadian albums chart — their first not to make the Top Three — but it became their highest-charting release up to that point on the Billboard 200 reaching #111. Born on a Pirate Ship also featured the group's first U.S. pop hit, "The Old Apartment" (#40 U.S., #14 Canada, #32 Canada adult contemporary). Two other singles hit the Canadian charts, "Shoe Box" (#10 Canada, #15 Canada AC) and "Break Your Heart" (#47 Canada AC). As always, the group's punmanship, musicianship, and overall songwriting were impressive, but the themes of some of the songs got a little dark and disturbing for my tastes. Then again, as a Pittsburgh-area kid who grew up rooting for the local Major League Baseball team and has had to endure four and a half decades of mostly mediocrity since our last World Series, I can understand how being born on a Pirate ship might have an adverse effect on the psyche. My favorite tracks were "Shoe Box," "This Old Apartment," "Stomach vs. Heart," "This Is Where It Ends," "When I Fall, "I Live With It Every Day," and "Same Thing." I already wrote about BNL's fourth studio LP, Stunt, much earlier on this list. 1677. Alien Invasion - ApologetiX Released in late March 2020, Alien Invasion was the 58th ApologetiX LP. With spoofs of ELO, UFO, XTC, AC/DC and the DC5, it could have been called “Initial Reaction.” But those five acts also have something else in common with the other seven spoofed herein — they’re all British. Yes, AC/DC came from Australia, but most of the members were born in Britain. Conversely, the founding members of Hot Chocolate were born in Jamaica and Trinidad, but the group formed in London and is considered a British band. As music historians know, the “British Invasion” occurred in the 1960s, when U.K. bands stormed the U.S. pop charts, led by The Beatles. The last track on this album spoofs the first British Invasion hit by a group other than The Beatles. The next-to-last song spoofed on this CD was written and produced by one of The Beatles, and the first song spoofed on this CD was written and produced by the man who produced The Beatles when they reunited in 1994. Those who loathe parody might be tempted to call this project “Invasion of the Melody Snatchers,” but at least they’d be correct to allude to us as aliens, and not just because the third track on this CD is a parody of UFO. Consider this, if you will … As Americans, the members of ApologetiX are aliens to the U.K., even though we all have some British roots. As Christians, we’re aliens to this world (1 Peter 2:11, Hebrews 11:13), even though we all have a human heritage. And why is that? Because we’ve all had a “close encounter” with Jesus. This world is not our home. Other artists we covered here whom I didn't mention already are Badfinger, Dexys Midnight Runners, Dire Straits, Joe Jackson, Elton John, and Ozzy Osbourne. 1678. Kill to Get Crimson - Mark Knopfler Mark Knopfler's fifth solo LP may have been his most laid-back effort to date ... musically speaking, that is. There were still plenty of things going on lyrically, and the music was still powerful and evocative, as usual. Released on September 17, 2007, Kill to Get Crimson reached #26 on the Billboard 200 and #9 on the U.K. albums chart. My top track is the lovely "Let It All Go," which contains the line that inspired the album's title, "I'd kill to get crimson on this palette knife." Sounds menacing, but it's actually just a first-person story song narrated from a painter's perspective. Other favorites of mine include "The Scaffolder's Wife," "The Fish and the Bird," "Heart Full of Holes," "True Love Will Never Fade," "Punish the Monkey," and "Madam Geneva's." My next tier would include "The Fizzy and the Still," "Secondary Waltz," and "In the Sky," but "We Can Get Wild" and "Behind With the Rent" are fine tunes, too. Knopfler always has something interesting to say, and so does his guitar. 1679. Braggadocious - ApologetiX Released in mid-July 2020, Braggadocious was the 59th ApologetiX LP and the first we finished after Pennsylvania's COVID lockdowns had kept us out of the studio from March 19 through May 20. It featured parodies of Bachman-Turner Overdrive The Beatles, Blue Öyster Cult, Def Leppard, The Doors, Human League, Tommy James, Led Zeppelin, Juice Newton, Todd Rundgren, Styx, and Wang Chung. The last four tracks on the album were live recordings from our 25th anniversary concert in 2017. Hall of Fame baseball pitcher Dizzy Dean once said, “It ain’t braggin’ if you can back it up.” Regardless of whether Ol’ Diz was right, the Bible surprisingly shows that not all boasting is bad. This CD refers to two different kinds of bragging done by two different kinds of people — those who are “Braggin’ and Lyin’” (track 2) and those who want to “Brag on the Lord All Day” (track 8). It doesn’t take a genius to identify bad bragging. The world is full of that, and an even people who don’t read the Bible know that pride goeth before a fall, a saying based on Proverbs 16:18. But the Good Book has a lot to say about good bragging, too. In Jeremiah 9:23–24, the Lord says: “Let not the wise boast of their wisdom or the strong boast of their strength or the rich boast of their riches, but let the one who boasts boast about this: that they have the understanding to know me, that I am the Lord, who exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth, for in these I delight …” Both 1 Corinthians 1:31 and 2 Corinthians 10:17 say, “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.” Later the Apostle Paul goes on to say, “If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness” (2 Corinthians 11:30). In Galatians 6:14, he adds, “May I never boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, through which the world has been crucified to me, and I to the world.” Bad bragging can get you into trouble, and so can good bragging, but let’s all praise, and don’t fear the people. Everyone who redirects the spotlight from themselves to Jesus, goes from brags to riches. 1680. Get Lucky - Mark Knopfler Get Lucky was Mark Knopfler's sixth solo LP. Released on September 14, 2009, it made it to #17 on the Billboard 200 and #9 on the U.K. albums chart. Although he never had a solo hit of the magnitude of "Sultans of Swing" or "Money for Nothing," Knopfler is a model of consistency, like a baseball player who routinely bats .300 with 25 home runs and 100 RBI. Consequently, it's tempting to take his tremendous talents for granted. My highlights from Get Lucky were "Cleaning My Gun," "Piper to the End," "Border Reiver," "The Car Was the One," and "You Can't Beat the House." I have the digital deluxe edition, which includes five bonus tracks, and four of them are particularly good: "Early Bird," "Time in the Sun," "Home Boy," and "Good as Gold." In case you're wondering, we already covered the 1981 Loverboy LP Get Lucky on this list over a thousand entries ago. 1681. Rocker - Elvis Presley The Rocker album came out in 1984, and I bought a copy in 1990, but all the songs on it were from the '50s. I know it seems almost comical now to think that many people once considered Elvis Presley to be not only a rocker but a danger to civilization ... or at least a threat to polite society. But sometimes comedy = trajectory + time. The funniest thing for me is how short the songs are. Six of the 12 tracks are less than two minutes long, and the longest is only 2:32. With that kind of frantic pace, Elvis could have given The Ramones a run for their money. Most of the tunes are cover versions, including four originally done by Little Richard: "Tutti Frutti," "Ready Teddy," "Rip It Up," and "Long Tall Sally." There's also "I Got A Woman" (Ray Charles), "Shake, Rattle & Roll" (Big Joe Turner), "Money Honey" (Clyde McPhatter and The Drifters), and "Lawdy Miss Clawdy" (Lloyd Price). Only four of the selections were actual hits for Elvis (unless you count "Money Honey," which stalled at #76), and two of those were also cover versions, "Hound Dog" (#1, but originally done by Big Mama Thornton) and "Blue Suede Shoes" (#20, but originally done by Carl Perkins). The others were "Jailhouse Rock" (#1) and "(You're So Square) Baby I Don't Care" (#14 R&B), both of which came from 1957 movie Jailhouse Rock. Elvis even plays electric bass on "(You're So Square) Baby I Don't Care," and it's a nice riff, too. |
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If you'd like to donate to the ministry of ApologetiX, there are a couple ways you can do it. |
If you prefer to mail a check or money order, please make it out to "ApologetiX" and send it to:
ApologetiX
208 Charlemma Drive
Pittsburgh PA 15214-1414
Although the donations are not tax-deductible, they will be received very gratefully and used immediately. Thank you! |
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Nevertheless, there will be no more gloom for those who were in distress. In the past he humbled the land of Zebulun and the land of Naphtali, but in the future he will honor Galilee of the nations, by the Way of the Sea, beyond the Jordan — The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of deep darkness a light has dawned. Isaiah 9:1-2 |
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P.O. Box 101705
Pittsburgh, PA 15237
USA
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